The Gift of Fearlessness
December 24, 2020
Fear is a parasite that feasts on your hope and dreams. Whether it’s the fear of loss, missing out on something, or the fear of rejection, fear drains your soul of life and joy. Fear paralyzes.
How much does fear rule your life? Is it turning you into a person you don’t like? Is it an unwanted companion you wish would go away?
Here are five common fears and tips for dealing with them.
1. You let what people think of you affect how you live
It’s nice to feel accepted… to belong. But when you compromise who you are to fit in and be accepted, something needs to change.
Never let the fear of rejection shape your desires or the kind of person you want to become.
Settling for a life that isn’t truly yours is settling for life in prison.
Never let people control how you act, think, or live. Sure, they have an influence – but not a controlling influence. Living a life of reaction isn’t living at all.
Your life is YOURS to live.
So decide what YOU want! Stop making unhealthy compromises just to fit in or be accepted. Don’t change who you just to keep “love” or certain people in your life.
Decide what you want and don’t want. Set realistic, achievable goals. And take action because “action” is an effective strategy for escaping fear’s grip.
2. You keep your thoughts and desires to yourself
The fear of criticism is as powerful as the fear of rejection. You might think that if they really knew how you thought or felt – if they knew the REAL you – they might not like you. So what? Is pretending to be something you’re not and sacrificing your happiness really worth it?
The thing is, people can tell when you’re holding back, leading them not to trust you or wondering if you’re being deceptive.
Give yourself the gift of being honest. It might take courage at first but peace of mind and heart, along with self-respect, are worth the risk.
Respect your ideas enough to share them because your thoughts, feelings, and desires are just as important as anyone else’s.
3. You resist trying new things
The fear of failure keeps us from taking chances and risks – even well-calculated ones.
This type of fear shows up as putting things off, sabotage, panic, and anxiety attacks.
The fear of failure is crippling. It undermines our abilities and confidence. We start believing things like, “I’m not good enough,” or “I’m not worthy,” or “I’ll never be as good as they are.”
If this sounds like you, find some inspiring quotes that give you the courage to move forward; keep them where you can see them all the time, like on a mirror or the refrigerator, to be reminded often of how amazing you are. As you take action, your self-confidence will grow, and your life will improve little by little.
4. You avoid doing the right thing
Fear makes people do things they know are wrong. It can also keep them from doing what they know is right by either saying nothing or doing nothing.
Are you afraid of offending someone, being punished, judged, rejected, ostracized, or of retaliation?
When forced to choose between right and wrong, remember your principles and what you believe.
Decide to stand up for what’s right.
If you need some courage to do the right thing, write on a piece of paper, all the things fear will cost you or others if you stand idly by and do nothing. Then, burn it up and move forward bravely.
5. You settle for less than you want or deserve
You settle for a career that’s just “okay,” or a safe but passionless relationship or you settle for “average” health that’s just a few pounds overweight.
You fool yourself into believing that it isn’t really that bad. “It could be worse,” you think… at least you’re safe and know what to expect.
You get one life. Never settle; it doesn’t do you or anyone else any good. Settling snuffs out hope. Want a dull, boring, numb life? Settle. Settling kills enthusiasm, hope, passion, and creativity.
Want to stop settling? Start taking risks, even small ones. You deserve to live life on YOUR terms; if you’re not trying, you’re not living. And if you’re settling, you’re not free either.
Stop worrying about disappointing people, and start living and dreaming of a brighter, more passionate tomorrow.
Different Types of Fears Holding You Back
Fear is a thief waiting to steal your joy and everything you hold dear to your heart. Here’ a common list of fears we all struggle with from time time:
- Fear of the unknown
- Fear of making a mistake
- Fear of criticism
- Fear of failure
- Fear of abandonment
- Fear of not being popular
Overcoming Your Fears
Below are some helpful tips for transforming fear from something that holds you back into something that propels you forward:
- Examine your values
- Believe in yourself
- Spend time in reflection and meditation
- Practice living in the moment and not in the past or the future
- Keep a journal
- Seek divine guidance
- Realize that you’re not alone
- Take an action every day that reinforces the best version of yourself
- Embrace a little bit of uncertainty in your life
- Be true to yourself no matter
This holiday season, give yourself the gift of courage and start living YOUR life.