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Cutting-edge information and tips for creating health in all areas of life – wellness, nutrition, fitness, attitude, and relationships

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June 8, 2023

How To Overcome Self-Defeating Habits & Be Happy

Self-defeating habits are thoughts and behaviors that keep us from unlocking our best life. They keep us stuck and frustrated and eventually flood our lives with regret. It’s tricky. After all, we might not even know we’re doing them because we do them automatically without thinking. We feel the effects because they affect our dreams, relationships, health, and well-being negatively.   Here are ten great tips for understanding your self-defeating habits and overcoming them. 1. Evaluate your life for self-defeating habits You can’t overcome something you don’t know exists. So step back and review your life. What thoughts, feelings, and behaviors seem to work against you, keeping you from what you want?  Do you procrastinate, self-sabotage, or engage in negative self-talk?  Are you your worst critic or best friend? And what coping attitudes, thoughts, and behaviors are you allowing to keep you from creating the life you want?  Identify your self-defeating habits and list them on paper; bring them into the real world so you can start changing.  2. Understand the underlying beliefs and emotions  It’s not enough to identify your self-defeating habits. You must also know their root cause.  Researchers discovered in a study on golfers that those who spoke negatively about the game and their skills performed worse than those who used self-affirming language.  Imagine if you started using self-affirming language in every area of your life. Believing and feeling that you’re not good enough or don’t measure up is one of the root causes of negative self-talk. Recondition…

Self-defeating habits are thoughts and behaviors that keep us from unlocking our best life. They keep us stuck and frustrated and eventually flood our lives with regret. It’s tricky. After all, we might not even know we’re doing them because we do them automatically without thinking. We feel the effects because they affect our dreams,…

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What is happiness? The dictionary says it’s “A state of well-being and contentment.” That’s a good start, but how can you know if you’re happy? What does happiness look like?  Although happiness is in the mind of the “beholder,” you’re probably happy when the following things are true about your life:  Happiness is more than…

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An animal can be a good source of comfort and a much-needed physical presence during distressing times. They promote emotional stability by providing companionship and helping remove the focus from everyday challenges.  An emotional support animal can be a dog, cat, or even, as shown on Eyewitness News, a pig if it comforts its owner….

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What good parent doesn’t want their kids to be happy and successful? But how do we do that, exactly? We compliment and affirm, support them, tell them to chase their dreams, and teach them to live for something bigger than themselves. What else can we do? According to experts, we should teach them how to be…

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Does modern life’s fast pace and complexity ever feel like too much? Do you ever wish things would slow down long enough for you to jump off the hamster wheel and rest a minute? Maybe it’s time to simplify your life. Maybe it’s time to say, “Enough!” and regain control.  Maybe…it’s time to realize that…

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There’s no way of sugar-coating it. To unlock your best life – to be successful and happy – you must learn how to eliminate self-destructive behaviors and replace them with healthy ones.  Shame Shame can make eliminating self-destructive behaviors challenging.  It’s easy to sink into shame when we mess up. Instead of realizing that we…

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Want to change your life? Change your habits.  To rephrase a popular statement, the habits that got you here won’t get you where you want to go.  You change your life when you change your habits.  But it isn’t about “breaking” bad habits; it’s about replacing them with good ones.  But what if you’re mostly…

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They tell us: “You deserve to be happy.” They even say that pursuing happiness is our God-given right.  But is happiness what we want, or is our soul searching for something deeper? The thing about happiness is that it comes and goes.  You can be happy one minute, and the next, you’re down in the…

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Divorce is the end of a relationship and the dreams that go along with it.  In a divorce, someone leaves, and someone is left.  The finality of it all can throw a person into grieving and mourning, even if they want out of the marriage. Knowing the end has come – that it is all…

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We need mental toughness today now more than ever, not just to survive but to flourish.  Self-monitoring is a kind of self-awareness that develops mental toughness and resilience.  What is mental toughness? According to Mental Toughness Inc., “Mental toughness is the ability to resist, manage and overcome doubts, worries, concerns and circumstances that prevent you from…

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We all have wants and needs, dreams and desires, and hopes. Sometimes we can achieve them on our own, but we often need the help of others, which requires the fine art of friendly persuasion.   People tend to like helping nice, friendly people – people who are caring, selfless, and trustworthy. Those traits can win…

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Imagine being fully in charge of your life and reaching a level of personal freedom where you only have yourself to answer to. Imagine dreaming, setting, and achieving goals.  Being independent and practicing personal autonomy is a dream that few people seem to achieve.  But, personal autonomy is more than just focusing on you and…

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